It was early December. I was in my second month of pregnancy. You were our little strawberry seed. You wouldn’t have been more than 1.5mm long. Just under 5 weeks old: our baby.
You would’ve looked like a teeny tiny tadpole. Your heart and brain were just beginning to form. It would’ve been too early to know whether you’d be a baby boy or girl.
I guess that question will remain unanswered.
We weren’t destined to meet, baby. I know you know we prayed SO hard for you. We would’ve given anything to keep you thriving inside me. But Waheguru had something else planned.
That pure joy we experienced upon seeing that first positive pregnancy test, I won’t ever forget it. Within minutes we were planning how to tell the family about you, knowing you’d bring so much joy to everyone. We cried heavy tears of pure happiness that night, holding on to eachother so tightly.
“You’re newly married, you have plenty of time to try again” – that was the general consensus. But we didn’t want to think about trying again, we just wanted you. Nothing could ever change the fact that you existed. If only fleetingly. You had an impact on our lives, baby, I hope you know that. Even if we only knew of your existence for a few days. You changed us.
Thank you. Thank you for letting me nurture you inside me for those few weeks. Thank you for awakening that motherly instinct in me and that fatherly instinct in your Dad. Thank you for letting us dream without bounds. Thank you for blessing my womb and giving us the lifelong privilege of being your parents. And thank you for sending another little blessing our way two months later. ❤
You made us stronger, you brought us closer together and you renewed our faith in Waheguru. You are nothing short of a miracle, baby.
It gives me peace to know that your soul is free and you’ve merged back with Waheguru. Who knows, maybe one day we’ll meet again and I’ll be able to hold you in my arms, finally.
Until then, just know that your light will always shine on in our little family. You’ll remain in our hearts until the end of time.
We’ll love you forever and ever, that’s a pinky promise from Mummy and Daddy to you: our little strawberry seed that was taken too soon. ❤